Henri’s face lights up.
“Hola, mi amor” (hello, my love), he beams as I walk into the grocery store. Then, with kisses, he greets me like a long-lost family member. Sometimes Henri and one of my other favorites, Imi, fight over me. I’m not kidding.
It’s very serious business over who gets to greet me first when I go to the supermarket. Henri, one of my favorites, always greets me with a big smile and “hola, mi amor.” More often than not, this warm welcome is the highlight of my day. It's the life I've always wanted.
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I go to the shop most days. Dawdling a couple of blocks from my apartment, it’s a simple daily ritual just to pick up a few things. I chose to live this way because I didn’t want a car. So picking up a few things each day means I don’t have a lot of heavy bags to lug home.
It’s only a seven-minute walk, and since I work from home, it’s a nice excuse to get out of the house. And get my kisses, of course!
Grown Men Fight Over me at the Supermarket
You may wonder what makes me so special to receive such a warm greeting. Nothing.
It’s not because I’m a good tipper; it’s because they consider me one of their own. Just me. I’ve never seen them like this with any other foreigner. So I asked Imi one day why they are always happy to see me. His response: “You’re like us.” Meaning that I’m polite. Greeting them as a Mexican would.
It’s nothing special. It only takes a moment to smile and say, “Buenos días, ¿cómo está?” (Good morning, how are you?) Just like their family and friends do.
This simple greeting and maybe some chit-chat while my groceries are being rung up make a world of difference. It's a two-minute exchange that sets me apart from every other expat I see at the grocery store.
I’m not the only one who’s noticed how welcoming Mexico is. When International Living ranked the world’s top retirement havens in 2020, Mexico came first for fitting in. One expat threw a rooftop party in Playa del Carmen, and 40 people came. “I didn’t even know 40 people to invite to a party back in California!” she said.
I’ve spent nearly ten years living in Belize, Guatemala, and now Mexico. And not once in all that time have I seen another foreigner do this.
To my way of thinking, the quickest way to be accepted into a community is to look at their culture and do what they do.
No, You Don’t Have to Kiss Everyone (But it Helps)
Please let me explain. I’m not saying run around willy-nilly and kiss every person you see. Although I’m sure that would make you very popular. I’m just sharing this little tip that has worked for me in every Central American country I’ve lived in.
In Belize, it was a smile, nod, and hand slap. In Guatemala, it was a good morning and a nod of the head or a handshake. Here in Mexico, it’s a smile, good morning, and a kiss on the cheek.
Greeting people in the way their culture dictates, no matter which country you choose to live in, will help you be accepted quickly into that community. Plus, it’s respectful, and it sets you apart from other expats who just go about their business.
Because I greet them like their friends do, Henri and Imi, along with my other favorites at the grocery store, are now like family. I love them. The ladies and I swap recipes, and they give me advice. They miss me when I go on trips. They celebrated and hugged me when I shared that I was going home for my dad's 80th birthday.
Then they embraced me when I got back. Actually, one saw me and yelled, “Belinda!” Then, like a wave, the heads all turned toward me, and the hugs and kisses began. One had a tear of joy when I showed him photos of Dad and me at a wildlife sanctuary.
Actually, I’m not sure if it was over our lovely family moment or the koala in the picture. But he was tickled pink to see pictures of my family and to share in a special moment.
This is my everyday life in Mexico. These oldies who pack groceries at the supermarket are some of my favorite people. They make me feel like family, which is such a beautiful way to live.
This applies to every area of my life. When I decided to take up swimming, the same thing happened. Arriving at a popular swimmers' beach and not knowing a soul, I said good morning instead of putting my bag down and getting in the water like most people.
A quick smile and a greeting of “Buenos días” meant everyone smiled and said good morning back. That’s their culture. One simple exchange created an instant sense of acceptance and community. I found my swimmers' tribe.
It really is that simple. Making friends, building a support network, and finding your tribe is as simple as smiling and saying good morning. Then came the kisses.
When to Kiss in Mexico (and when not to)
That’s something I should clarify. It’s normal to greet friends and family with a kiss on the cheek, but not a total stranger or someone you're meeting in a business setting. I mean, you don’t have a meeting with a bank manager and go in for a smooch if you don’t know them.
With people you’ve met before, a kiss in greeting is absolutely fine. And with people you see daily, like Henri or Imi, it is expected. It is normal. We look forward to seeing each other, so it would be weird if there were no kisses.
Most of all, I wanted to share this with you so you can see how easy it is to build a life in Mexico. Mexican culture is warm and friendly, so if you smile at people and greet them like a friend, then you’ve already set yourself apart from most other foreigners.
And then, when you go to get groceries, you’ll get kisses too. It’s my favorite way to shop.
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